Live For Love Date Connection
 I am a
seeking a
who is from
to
who has a photo 
        


   
         
 
ArticlesBack  
It was going so well...what happened??
February 24, 2010

There seems to be a new phenomenon of late whereby a first date seems to go extremely well and may well lead on to a second date and then all of a sudden it's over. Why would this happen when everything seemed so right? The chemistry was there, shared interests and the kissing was good too so what happened? I wish I had an answer to this one as it has happened to me a couple of times and each time it has left me pondering how many different variables are involved in making a successful relationship. I do however have some theories that may at least ease the pain of the rejection.

Firstly, people are complicated when it comes to issues of the heart and to the most part we have spent many years cultivating in our heads just what our ideal partner would be. These expectations we have of people can put an enormous strain on a forming relationship and it is important to give people a little leeway. Understandably, people do make allowances for failed expectations however the truth is that a little too much wine can lower our expectations a little too much and make us act in a way that is not true to our real feelings. It's only when the date is over and the effects of alcohol subside do we realize that the person really isn't suitable at all.

Secondly, most people have some sort of emotional baggage whether that takes the form of an unresolved previous relationship or emotional fear of becoming attached again. I have often wished that people could be more up front about any concerns like this but often they are not and unfortunately, people find it easier to lie themselves out of a difficult emotional situation.

Thirdly, an old boyfriend or girlfriend wants them back and your date was in a sense using you to see if they are up to starting another relationship or not. This situation is probably the worst as you will find it extremely difficult to compete with someone your date has history with. On old partner will not require all the time and effort involved in starting again and represents a comfortable way out of the dating scene.

Finally, and possibly the most difficult to swallow is that perhaps you were just too keen and got a little carried away. It's such a hard balancing act to do, knowing when the time is right to open up your emotions to someone and yet be sure that you're not making yourself too vulnerable. It's even harder when all the signals are telling you that it's ok to be swept away, especially if the date has taken on quite an intimate nature.

So what can you do now? The most sensible thing you can do is to reflect on what has happened and file it away in your experience drawer in the safe knowledge that you are that much wiser on the dating scene. Take it slower next time and don't be too quick to allow yourself to fall. Be sure the signs are right and trust your instincts. If there is a niggling doubt in your mind about something, generally there is something wrong and it's only the ecstasy of falling in love that is preventing you from facing it.


 
   Language Option

   News
New Dating Guide for Seniors
June 5, 2011
Are you over age 65, single and thinking about entering the dating world? Are you not sure what to expect? Do you want to know the secrets and shortcuts to successful dating? Then, The Senior's Guide to Dating (Again) may be the book you need.

How has dating changed?...
more

Internet Dating More Successful than Thought
June 5, 2011
Internet dating is proving a much more successful way to find long-term romance and friendship for thousands of people than was previously thought, new research shows.

A new study of online dating site members has found that when couples who had built up a significant relationship by e-mailing...
more

All News

   Site Statistics
Members in Last Week:0
Total Male Members:164
Total Female Members:269
Pictures in Last Week:0
Members online:0

   Success Stories
In each other's arms this Christmas!

by 

Met Pietro on here a year ago (he has put his success story on too). He kept asking for a date but I kept putting him off!!!! I finally agreed to meet up in October of this year and we hit it off straight away. We have seen each other...
more
All Stories